I'll start off describing myself. I'm a 19 year old straight male who has lots of depression and anxiety. Couple that with OCD and ASD and I'm usually a mess of a person. For about a year now, I've had intense sexual urges that are very frequent and distracted. It all started very quickly. First of all, I've never had sex before, and since I was homeschooled, I was very rarely around any girls, much less ones that I was interested in. So for quite a while, I was never interested in looking sex or anything related to sex. I still had obsessive thoughts (as part of OCD), but never looked at porn, fantasized or masturbated. Then, within the last two years, my sexual urges have skyrocketed. Ever since I had first looked at porn (I prefer animated like hentai, since I find it much sexier), I became fascinated with everything about sex. I began masturbating shortly after that and, since then, can not stop. Sometimes I can be doing something completely unrelated to sex, yet will continue to obsess over it and have the urge to masturbate. At first, masturbation helped relieve the stress and I was satisfied. However, I began to do it more and more and more, to the point where I'm looking at porn and masturbating every day, sometimes several times a day. If my urge is really intense, it becomes somewhat painful until I orgasm. It's very distracting in my daily routine and goes against my moral guidelines. Even though I have standards, my natural urges usually win the battle against my morals.

Sex has always been something I was obsessed with. Lately has just been the worst it's ever been. When I was young, even about 4 or 5, I always loved being naked and playing with myself. I would encourage my friends, whether male or female, to also get naked because it felt better. I don't consider it abuse since it was always with kids my age, or just on my own accord.

I'm very eager to have sex, even though I want to wait until I find someone who I really love. I do have someone I'm interested in, but she is out of state and a couple years younger than me. I'm also very attracted to fictional characters, as its one of my biggest fetishes, but obviously I can't be intimate with them besides in my imagination. My question here is, how do I deal with these intense urges when I don't have a girl in my life I can have sex with? It is very intrusive in my daily life and usually makes me feel bad afterwards. I want to have sex really badly, but don't have a girl that I'm close with that is close to me geographically. I'm also very afraid that, before I can develop a relationship with someone, I'm gonna jump right into the sexual desires, scaring them off unless they too have these urges.

My obsession with sex has really taken over my rational thinking, and I really need help to cope with it. I appreciate all the help in advance.