It is different at first, feeling ok. I remember when I first went to pdoc, my h took me because he was so worried about me - I'd had a breakdown at work and my gp had given me a note for a week off, so i'd be able to get into pdoc, and all i could do upon sitting down in the chair across from him with h next to me when he asked how he could help was to just sit there and cry. h had to tell him what was going on i couldn't stop crying long enough to talk. he put me on Zoloft and trazodone, and thus began the process of saving my life. I am so grateful to him. When the black cloud of depression first started to dissipate within a week or two, I went between not knowing how I felt and feeling weird before I finally was able to believe I was starting to feel better. That black cloud had become so pervasive, so self-perpetuating, I honestly had forgotten there was any other way to exist. It took me another year or so before I felt ready to start talk therapy, and that completed the healing.