thanks.. i've been tryin to just chill compared to what was happening before resuming treatment back at the clinic..
talking to this new therapist seems to be different this time as more trauma related stuff is coming up rather than them trying to push bipolar diagnosis on me to cover all my crazyness..

i dont really know what the therapists plan is or what the new evaluation revealed to her.. maybe i can get them to discuss my diagnosis with me this time around... last time the people just kept telling me that diagnosis doesnt matter, and when i tried to tell them its important to me atleast they just kept saying im bipolar/manic and stop playing doctor...

i've never been manic before in my life though

anyway... im going to just try my hardest to come outright and tell the therapist these things and just see what she says.. if i dont get too scared and ... well whatever happens to me
she wants to see the jornal anyway.. maybe it just be a good thing to show and let go of trying to be the one in control.. why is it scary?
i guess sometimes you have no choice, sorry for not making a lot of sense.. my head is all messed up.. guess thats why i like to write things down and give them notes instead of trying to rely on my voice

blessings...