I never realized what PTSD was until this past year. I could never understand why at times without rational thinking i would just freak out or stress out... i would get angry and not mean to to different ones. It was people were triggering the things of memories that brought up old issues of traumas i had lived. I have buried so much for years that it is finally surfacing in layers, upon layers. I finally can better understand myself now, why i am guarded distrusting and so reserved. It is a culmination of things... of so much i have suffered it seems like and endless litany. Yet i now see light at the end of the tunnel. I have an elderly couple that he is PTSD and she is BPD. They have shown me the other side of living and how he gets so upset and reminds me of how i was and letting others upset me so. I am learning how to deal with others.
It is a lot when self realization hits you, how others rub you the wrong way for no reason and vice versa. I took a break and am back now.. not intentionally but it worked out that way. I have learned to live the words: to thine own self be true, first and foremost... ty for reading.