Hello Broken,

I'm sorry that you have gotten to the point where you feel this desperate and hopeless. I don't know anything about your physical condition or treatment options that still might be available. Maybe you could find something useful in the chronic pain forum, as there are members here who are learning to find meaning in life despite chronic pain.

If I were your doctor, terminating your professional relationship before you make your decision would not ease any of the sense of responsibility or caring or hurt. Your doctor is a person in your life, who wants better for you, and like any person who cares about you, putting distance in between will not make it better. I, too, would be interested in your doctor's response.

I hope you hang around for a while and give us a chance to help. You wouldn't be the first to find our community after hitting rock bottom, and then to find some hope and connection and find things getting more tolerable, and eventually find the will to carry on.

TC,
Rap