I've been up all night thinking since I posted this.. I agree that no alcohol needs to be a rule in my house and my husband doesn't drink so that's an easy step. Before I had drinks I told others this is now an alcohol free zone. I've also asked my friends to do sober stuff with me from now on too. Tea, meals, drives, etc... I guess I'm just worried about the strong cravings that hit, and I ask my husband for permission putting him in a ****** spot and sometimes he will say yes. I need to get so I don't ask him... or him to be strong enough to say no if he is threatening to leave me over it. I know I don't have a very good support system in place. That's scary. I know what I need to do but need resolve and supports in place to run with it. I'm tired of trashing my body. And I'd also like to sober up for some health concerns. Mental and physical. I have a lot of incentives. .. so why is this so hard??