Ugh. After six months of managing to drag myself to work without it, I re-applied for intermittent FMLA because I've really got to try to get this under control before I have to go out on short-term again. My pdoc is changing my meds around and I don't know if it's the meds or the bipolar depression that is making me this tired. He did have me try Risperdal but it turned me into a zombie and I felt like I was going to fall asleep on the way to work. I have no words for this level of fatigue. I felt dead on the inside. Now I am on a low dose of Elavil along with my other meds and I cannot tell yet if it is working.

What's really frustrating is that my bf understands none of this. It's vital to me that I get enough sleep so that I can function the next day. I finally told him that he has to sleep at his own place because he wakes up at 5am to go to work. It wakes me up and then I cannot fall back asleep. The one night he went to the bathroom in the middle of the night, came back into the bedroom, turned the light on, and flopped back onto the bed. When he's getting ready for work, he carried on because he can't find his phone or whatever. I can't take this. He had been calling me and texting and I haven't responded. He seems to think that just because he can stay up late and get up in the morning that I should be able to, too. He's constantly criticizing me for taking meds and doing what I can to take care of myself. I have just had it.