I don't know if she was abusive, but she was certainly smothering and overprotective. I am ~40 years old. It really bothers me that there are still apron strings to cut!

I'm not willing to compromise with her. I don't want to be around her, period. I can take small doses during family gatherings. That's it. Plus, the more I am around her, the more information she can extract to stalk me.

I find her very unpleasant to be around. She is a martyr/victim narcissist, very passive aggressive, very argumentative. I'm at the point where even having a conversation with her is pointless. She just argues. She'll ask your opinion. If you say A, she says you are wrong. If you then switch to B, she will say that you are wrong, it's A. When I went over on Mother's Day, she claimed she had to go out and started screaming at me from her driveway because showing up at her house with a present isn't good enough. I'm done, she's too crazy.

If I ask her why she is signing up for the same things I'm doing, she'll say it's because she's always wanted to do that. Maybe she believes it, I don't know. If I tell her that I don't want her to go, she will go out of spite and walk around with an angry face and tell people that I am there but don't want to be around her.