I almost titled this thread "when does trauma-related stress cross the line into actual PTSD?" but figured that would be too vague.

In 2009, I lost my first husband to an unexpected illness. It was a devastating loss and I suffered an emotional breakdown of sorts due to the grief and loneliness. I was able to recover due to the help of friends, counseling, medication, and circumstances coming together in a positive way. Even though my overall life became happy again for the most part, it was very painful for many years just to think back to his death.

A few months ago, I was struggling with stress due to emotional/addiction issues with my current husband. I went on a week-long getaway to the mountains in hopes that it would help me relax and clear my mind. Instead I freaked out due to the isolation (which is VERY unlike me since I'm usually a fierce lone wolf) and started having flashbacks to the loneliness I felt when H #1 died. I also became obsessed with imagining H #2 dying and how horrible that would feel, and long story short, I had another nervous breakdown that prompted me to go back on medication and seek therapy.

When my therapist heard this, she said "it almost sounds like you have PTSD." Emphasis on almost. Like the symptoms and emotional processes were similar. But I was always under the impression that PTSD resulted from an actual trauma--something involving violence and a threat to one's life and/or safety. For example, my best friend being abused as a child, and other acquaintances having battlefield flashbacks. My husband's death was not violent. He wasn't murdered or killed in a car wreck or anything like that. He got sick, was in a coma for three weeks, and died from natural causes. But it wrecked me emotionally nonetheless. For a long time I could barely stand thinking about it.

Do you think that the emotional pain of losing a partner could actually cause PTSD? Or were my experiences a fairly standard response to grief? The reason I ask is that there are treatments specifically tailored to people with PTSD that I wonder if I might benefit from. I plan to ask my therapist about this, but I'm curious what you guys think as well.