Hi I've been separated for 3 yrs after 32 yrs of marriage and now 35yrs together. I have been mentally abused and physically by my H and we have separated before twice,always with the promise of not happening again. He also had drinking issues and resolved them for 10 yrs then went back to it, broke us again, now this time it was the same only worse and the most disrespectful part was having him chating and doing things on the net with other women while i slept right in the same room. After I had open heart surgery he was even worse he had a by-pass and i was there every moment of the day, day in and out. when I had mine he didn't even come stay just popped in to say hi and left. When i got home i couldn't walk up stairs for a month so he was free to do as he please up stairs and now worry about it, when i finally went up there i discovered that he was on line web running and he didn't tell me cause i didn't see it in the minimized state this went on for a few weeks before I caught on and then i realized i was also on that web getting changed and being exposed to people I didn't know, and while i slept he did his thing, I gave him the choice he said my internet it's harmless and that he was a nudist now.....ok what to do I tried to ignore it but after about 9 mths i had enough and I started to get the feeling I needed to leave and maybe he would come around. So now I wait am I stupid to wait when he is out with others now and doesn't give me the time of day, i cant stop the love i felt that long ago and it just keeps me reliving stuff i dont' want to how do i stop it.