My therapist (for 8 years) died unexpectedly 2 months ago. I didn't get the SMS and after hearing the news rather randomly I pitched up on the doorstep for his wife to confirm which was unfortunately probably traumatic for her

On the one month anniversary I bought her a bonsai and she seemed to like it and I would like to do something for tomorrow. Should I leave flowers at the gate, or should I ring the buzzer to give them to her. I don't want to be intrusive. I could also just leave a card in the postbox.

I also thought of leaving something less generic - like specially sourced coffee beans (I know he liked his occasional "good" cup and I assume she did too?) But maybe that's too personal?

Can anyone help?