I have these moments where I wish My T was thinking of me as much as I do of them. I try to learn something from it. What's that need really about? Why would it make a difference to me that someone is "thinking" of me? The truth is that someone thinking of me doesn't actually do anything.

It seems for me the issue really is about validation. Feeling like my thoughts of her are somehow reciprocated makes me feel like I'm not crazy for thinking of he so much and I'm somehow more Real and Seen. But it all boils down to a need to be seen and connected with.

But wishing someone was thinking of us doesn't really do that. It's the experience that matters. Time spent is real. So .. how can I get this need met without relying on someone I can only see once a week for an hour. Call a friend. Do something for myself that tells me I'm worthy and valid. Get out of my head and into my own real life somehow.