I quit worrying so much about what my therapist was doing and why, that was her problem, not mine? Mine was to "use" her to help me. Focusing on the other person and what they are doing takes my focus off of me and working as hard as I can to get better.

No one can be 100% consistent in what they think, say, or do at all times to all people. Ideas and thinking changes over time and maybe in all the time since you've seen this T she has changed her thinking from what was in the book. The book can't change but people and their thinking can (thank goodness or we'd all be locked in our "wrong" or old thinking!). Get out of the other person's head and into your own? Think of something you feel is "true" and move outward from there.