I cannot relate to this situation, but wanted you to know you are heard and how sorry I am that you are going through this. It sounds very difficult and my heart goes out to you.

If you are thinking of ending this relationship, I'm glad you are seeking out help on how to handle it. It's a very big decision to kick someone such as a parent out of your life and you deserve support through this. Big hugs and lots of luck in everything. I hope you can get that fence up somehow. ((Hugs))