Hey, at the moment the "goal" is to stay safe and you're doing that? It doesn't necessarily stay as easy or hard all the time but fluctuates. So, don't know that you're backsliding, just seeing what "help" is available and it looks like it is pretty good since it's holding?
I would say you're giving back the contract and explaining how you broke it, why, and how you feel about him, etc. was very good. You are communicating/expressing yourself and doing "well" because he's "getting" you. He wouldn't be able to know when to believe/trust you and when not otherwise? But, he doesn't haven't to work as hard as he is; he truly cares about you, I think, to be working so hard for you?
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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