Quote:
Originally Posted by Only_Human1983
Maybe, but if he's not a changed man then how come he wants to commit all of a sudden and what has she got that made him do that? Just makes me feel s**t but I guess people find it hard to understand.
I don't pursue him at all and he's always the one to get in touch with me. I have tried several times to move on, but he keeps coming back and playing these games with my feelings. He maybe someone's fiancée but he is also my ex, so there's a lot of history. It's not like I've just got involved with someone I know is married or getting married.
I know everybody must think I'm pathetic and should be well over it already, but I just want to be the one that ends up happy and not him. If that makes me a bad person then I'm guilty
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"How come he wants to commit?"
He isn't really committing. He is engaged sure, but he texts and calls you behind her back even after she asked to stop. That's not what committed people do.
I am getting married in three weeks, trust me I know he isn't texting no one behind my back ( we both have friends of opposite gender but that's not what's happening here). He isn't your friend, he is your ex who knows you are in love and takes advantage by playing games
Sure he maybe is getting married but he never changed his ways. He isn't making true commitment
In order for you to move on you need to stop responding. He isn't holding you at gun point to talk to him.
And the argument that he is your ex and there is history is kind of faulty. Everyone has history and had exes. It doesn't mean one needs to do what you are doing even after exes moved on. When they are married or engaged or in a relationship, they are someone else's boyfriend, fiancées and husbands.
I am 50 and have plenty of exes. Should I carry on romance in texts and phone calls with them even after they are with someone else? What for? My ex husband is remarried, we talk but not about "I miss you" or in secret plus we have a child together, if he started what your ex does id remind him he is married. Just because we have history and heck we have present and future as parents, it's not good enough reason to play games with someone else's husband.
Sure he is the one who starts all that with you but you don't have to go along. No you aren't pathetic. But your thinking process just not allowing you to live happily. Sticking by his side will not make you happy. You aren't accomplishing anything but perpetuate pain.
Even if he leaves her he is still sane person. Even if he goes back to you he is still that same, not nice, person.
Are you in therapy?
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