As you know my ex is 6 months with someone else. I despise her for that, but I got rid of her behavior and abuse. But why do I feel the need to HELP her to keep things together with this guy while I want her to fail? Why do I want to help her while she doesn't even want help?

He is 14 years older then her, it disgusts me she is going for a guy with money. She totally neglects what she wanted in life. She wanted children, but he doesn't so she just "copes" with it. I want to see her fail, I want to see her crash I want to see her dreams get shattered for what she has done to me. But why do I feel the NEED to tell her what she did wrong? Maybe I get a kick out of telling her what she did wrong, but I would like to see her crying when her relationship explodes or she sees me with someone else.

I have never felt this before... is this... satanic? Why do I feel the urge of hoping and wishing for her relationship be destroyed, her coming back to me telling me she is sorry, and then deny her so hard and show her the door?