They don't like you. Plain and simple. They don't. They likely never did, but have been nice and patient with you because they are quite religious.
They don't need to have or give you a reason. It isn't any different from someone disliking chocolate - it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with chocolate, and they likely don't have a reason besides "I just don't like it".
It hurts to accept that not everyone will like you. You misread their kindness as a desire for friendship when it wasn't, and now you are struggling when reality isn't matching up with your fantasy.
How long have they been a group of friends at that church? How long have you been going to that church?
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..."
"I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am.
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