I wonder whether it's worth all the pain going through therapy. i've wanted this for so long.

why can't i just forget the past and get on with my life instead of letting my abuser and my mother and father ruin everything. i wish i was stronger, i try, really i try. i have no energy left. i just want peace of mind and to e happy and bubbly and 'normal' whatever that is. sorry to be so depressing.

jin