I like the Buddhist philosophy of the self. Since we are continuously changing, there is no way to define self. It's like trying to define a river. What is a river? Is it the water? It can't be, since the water that is there today isn't the same water that was there yesterday and won't be the same water that will be there tomorrow. But without the water, it is not a river.

Things that happened in our past happened. There's no way to change that so we must accept it. We must forgive others for what they did to us, but above all, we must forgive ourselves. Acceptance is giving up all hope for a better past.