Dear Alexa,
OH YES. The numbness of depression made me totally forget what it was like to be "in love" with my spouse. (We've been married a longer than 25 years.) My antidepressant does not make me detached. However, when I was at my absolute worst, I was drinking a half bottle of wine every evening while I prepared dinner and taking Xanax while at work (stressful job). I feel certain that the alcohol and Xanax deepened my depression. Alcohol can be a lovely thing when your are happy and celebrating but due to my last bout of depression, I no longer touch the stuff (the last time I had a drink was in January). Same thing with Xanax.
Lastly, I discovered in therapy that I had some unconscious things going on that were interfering with how I felt about my husband. You know, when your married, sometimes the partner is just the innocent victim of our despair.
So true love is possible when our depression lifts. That we are truly unable to love (oh so, so numb) is the tragedy that is depression. I am truly grateful to not currently be in that deep, dark pit.
Keep trying! Sincerely, Myst