I’m glad you were able to talk through some things with your boyfriend, that’s always good.

I have a few words of advice/caution. I once dated someone older who I thought I would spend my life with. He was charming, engaging, interesting, and oh were we passionate for one another. In hind sight, I mistook passion for love. When that passion faded away, it was clear that our relationship had no foundation. But there was something else also getting in the way. The age difference prevented us from ever being at the same point in life. Initially, he agreed to my life’s goals and wanted to be a part, but it came down to him saying yes only because in the throes of passion, he thought he could commit, but the reality is that he didn’t want to live the life I was living. In my case and in others’ cases who I know, relationships with age differences are very difficult for so many reasons.

The beginning of a relationship will always be intense, so when things settle down, you need to have a realistic expectation of the relationship. Life will start to balance between relationship, career, individuality, friends, family, and the such once the relationship falls into the comfort zone. Excitement just wears away in relationships and both of your lives will be less focused on giving each other constant attention. It’s not to say the he doesn’t love you any less, it’s just the natural evolution of relationships.

There are two things you said I’d just like to comment on (constructively, of course). First, you said that he is not doing things that you would do. The thing is that his actions are just that: his own actions. We can never expect people to act in a manner we would act, just the same way that you cannot act in a manner other people would act. If his actions, or lack of actions, are negatively affecting you, then maybe you’re not as compatible as you originally thought. This may have just been a onetime thing between you two, but if you find that you wish he would act differently, then it’s definitely time to reconsider because people change for no one but themselves. Second, you mentioned his money. Money can be a very sensitive topic, especially when you try to tell others how they should spend their money. Whether he knew about this money or not, it doesn’t change that it is his and he can spend it/save it/invest it/etc. however he wishes.

Relationships can be a tricky thing, I’ve had my share of them. If there is one thing I would go back in my life and change is that I would walk away sooner from some relationships rather than fight a losing battle to keep a spark alive that didn’t exist. I wish I would have had more respect for myself than to put so much effort into something that proved more negative than positive in my life. I’m happy to hear that things are looking up, but remember that you come first in your life, and if this guy is not fulfilling your needs and find that you’re fighting/questioning the relationship, then maybe it’s time to let go so that you can be happy. Good luck with everything!!