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when it comes to our daughter and i want to be cordial so we can coparent.
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You are admirable in your desire but you cannot control what he does. Even though you want to coparent for the sake of your daughter, it may be that he is not man enough to coparent with you right now.
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How can i be a better individual in order to be a better parent and communicate better without letting my anger get the best of me?
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It sounds to me like you are blaming yourself for being angry. Do not forget that there is a righteous, justified kind of anger. For example, you have every right to be angry with him when he demands sex before he will cooperate on anything concerning your daughter. You have every right to be angry when he contributes next to nothing to the support of his daughter.
You have every right to be angry about these things.
It sounds to me as though you don't need to be a "better individual" when it comes to coparenting:
he does.