Thank you for your post, Sky. It is exactly the way you describe it.

My husband is beginning to understand how confusing and nightmarish PTSD is. He is even beginning to recognize when I am triggered.

I was so lost and terrified, and then when my pdoc finally pinpointed the PTSD diagnosis, it was like a ray of light entering a dark room through a crack in the wall. My pdoc understands PTSD better than I do. It has been difficult for me to reconcile the reality that PTSD will never go away. I dread the day that I ever have to find a new pdoc.

But yes.... those that don't have PTSD really do not/cannot understand what it is like. It's like they think I am being overly dramatic or even wallowing in my trauma to get attention. They don't understand why I can't just cope.

Can I tell you anything positive about my PTSD? The positive thing is that I know what I am dealing with... that affliction of mine has a name. Pdoc can tinker with my med levels to help me keep that monster at a managable level (most of the time). I know now that I am not crazy... just very damaged. It was a great relief to me to have a starting point for learning to live again.

Other than that, it is a monster inside me. I am just glad that I am not the only one... that there are others like you out there that understand the hell that is PTSD.