Oh, I forgot this for awhile. My pdoc is sort of using my craving for benzos to push... benzos.

It is relatively probably true that I could handle the stairs if I had benzos. So, he wants to prescribe them. I've turned them down a couple of times already. I think next time he brings it up I'll accept a prn script just to give myself the choice. He obviously hasn't seen how bad it is to come off them. And I've told him how hard it was for me. But I need help with the panic of the stairs. So I'll just say OK, and give myself the choice, if indeed they help me with the stairs.

It could be a huge mistake, but I'm aware of that. I just need to be able to deal with the stairs again.