For more than 3 years I have suffered from a not-often-reported form of depression. The principle, and continuous, symptom has been a feeling of fogginess (but not “brain fog” in the sense of cognitive impairment), grogginess, being partially drugged or anesthetized, my brain not fully “awake,” and the external world appearing visually somewhat dreamlike, as though a veil separates me from it. This symptom does not come and go, rather I wake up with it every morning. It has a large negative effect on my motivation and enjoyment.

My psychiatrists and therapist have labeled this condition depression, partly because I have a long history of this symptom (though recovering from it repeatedly, once for a span of 16 years) and partly because I have experienced off and on other depressive systems as well, notably surges of visceral anxiety. In these past 3 years I have tried several AD meds. In the past year I had the genetic test of the MDHFR mutation, which led to my taking Deplin (L-methylfolate) to help with serotonin and other hormonal absorption. This supplement, taken in conjunction with Effexor and Buspar, may have helped with the anxiety, which has greatly receded in the past several months. However, the physical fogginess and the sense of a mental “veil” remain. The symptom may possibly be an expression of derealization/depersonalization, though I have no other symptoms of those disorders. I have discovered no evidence of a thyroid condition, heart condition, or sleep apnea or other sleep problem. I sleep quite normally. Because my health professionals have done a lot of head scratching over my condition, I’m eagerly interested in knowing about others with this weird illness, which does not cripple me but leaves me hesitant to travel, take on new projects, or face complex responsibilities. I’m of senior age.

Rossovers