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sidony said:
Okay so. I finally found a job. I think I'll really like the place. That's great news!

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Congratulations! I am so happy for you. Whew!

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Bad news: I chickened out on negotiating better pay even when they clearly expected me to. And I don't need higher pay, but the memory of shortchanging myself tortures me (translation: I now feel stupid).

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Why do you think you chickened out? Maybe refer to our therad on rejection and see if you'd like to join the club; membership is free, lol. It seems that your situation relates to the theme of what we are all talking about-- that fear to be assertive, even when the question is posed to you and the expectation is there.

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I left T a message earlier so I can tell him about the job (will have to figure out when I can do therapy now), but I guess I'll also want to talk to him about how to control obsessive thinking. I mean, why can't I just enjoy the good without tormenting myself for mistakes?

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Cause then you might not need therapy, lol. Seriously though, try to separate the situation. There is the job and then there is the obsessing about tormenting yourself for mistakes. They are totally separate things. One of them is about your job, the other is about you. Try to separate it a bit so that you can allow yourself to be happy about your job-- the other stuff comes from within you and you can start to work that out with T.

Once again, congratulations on your new job. I wish you the best and really hope you settle in quickly and enjoy it.