Is there anyone in your life who can be with you right now? Do you have the option of going IP? Have you called around to get legal counsel? I really think you need to get medical help right now. I wish I had more experience with this issue so I could offer more practical advise. I really have no clue what to suggest in a situation like this. Maybe you could go to a local AA meeting. Something tells me you might be able to receive proper advise and practical solutions there. I bet a few people at the meetings will have been through this and can help you know what to expect and what is best to do.