Hey. Its my first day on this forum. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. It is true that no matter what pain we feel, someone has it worse, but still, pain is pain and you have a right to feel bad at times. Thank goodness you have a wife who has stood by you so many years and congrats on 30 years of holy matramony!
Laurie
(PS I have a chameleon named Tucker!)