Quote:
Originally Posted by SuperwomanBp2
I am so tired of feeling like a walking corpse one minute, aggravated the next and then good the following.
I feel I'm a stranger in my own body and it's messed up. I so desperately want off this ride. I never realized how crippling Bipolar can be until now. I have this nagging desire to go shopping and have sex, to the point it hurts, but I just don't have the energy to act upon it. I'm in hell and just relying on the hope my medication works.
Being in this mixed state is a nightmare. I'm exhausted, but can't sleep, because I can't turn off my brain. Why can't there be an on/off switch?
I just wish to feel like my old self again.
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Every recent post of mine has been how I'm struggling in a mixed state. I get it. I'm going through a total med change that is going horribly. I get dysphoria with mine. And rage. In the past week I've thrown over two kitchen chairs and a coffee table. And guess where pdoc is?? Out of town! Wonderful! I've been hiding in my room from my family. It's like Dr Jekyll and Hyde! Hang in there Hun, you're not alone. It's part of this horrible illness.
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