Thank you Ladyshadow. I will continue to post here daily because I know my family and friends are starting to get annoyed hearing constantly about it LOL. I can't help but have a part of me wishing that we could get back together even though I know it would just be the same toxic **** that I have been dealing with the entire relationship. He texted me Tuesday and Wednesday night just random things and now he hasn't even texted me at all tonight and I'm not gonna lie I was really hoping he was going to. This sucks and I miss him so much. I am trying to stay strong and MoveOn like I'm supposed to but I find myself coming home you breaking down and crying constantly because everything around me reminds me of him. Part of me that wonders if he even is upset over this break up he said that he was Monday night but I don't know if I believe him he's hurt me so bad. how can you love someone and hate someone so much at the same time? I'm sorry I'm rambling on I'm just so hurt I thought that we could just make it through this and we would be OK but I was very wrong and it scares me to move on and start dating again in this god awful world.