Perna, do you really notice stuff like this when sitting on the couch in therapy? Do you really notice this stuff when chatting with your friends and family members too? If so I likely I would find you kinda scary to talk with in person.

Although I am starting to like my T… honestly I’m not sure if I’d recognize her in a crowd. This post has now got me thinking…what in the hell do I look at when I am there? …I know the couch is a really ugly floral pattern. %#@&#!, I can only imagine what kind of foibles she’s been picking up.

Uh oh… your comments have triggered a cascade of thoughts... I am really stupid. Maybe this is why I don't feel emotionally intimate with people, 'cause I'm missing most of what is going on during a conversation! Although at times I get upset about feeling like I am out of the loop, maybe in reality I am quite comfortable being clueless. Could this be yet another defensive mechanism? Maybe I really don’t want intimacy. It’s the ‘what you don’t know can’t hurt you’ defense.

Hmm..I will need to reflect on this for a while.