Dear Só leigheas,
A lot of us can relate to feeling "so weak". I've felt that way and have had a relatively trauma-free life. And waiting for darkness and anxiety to pass--I can relate. There just must be a biological component to these things. And what goes on inside our heads can just be unfathomable sometimes. So, you know, I'm just so sorry you are struggling. I hope you feel a little better when the sun comes up!
Sincerely, Myst