I'm so sorry you are feeling so bad and dealing with money troubles. We had a big unexpected pet emergency and had to spend all our savings and even some grocery money.... so we are keeping all fingers crossed that we somehow can get through the month without any other emergencies. Money troubles just suck and can really bring you down. I'm so, so sorry. I also understand the fear of going IP. I HATE IT. But sometimes it's the best place for us unfortunately are you currently safe?