Hey everyone !
This is my first thread here so it will be much appreciated if you could help me and take your time to read it.

Brief :
I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder when i was around age 14 or so .
Then came the derealization disorder that i remember it started in math class , when i was trying to learn something i just felt unfocused and couldnt focus on what im doing , but when the class was over it went away..
But one day in class after we finished learning , the feeling stayed with me ever since...
It was when i was around 17 and now im almost 21.
On the first days i felt like a robot , answering people questions automatically and responding to a situation automatically without any feeling.
When i laughed i couldnt feel that im really laughing on the inside , it felt so ... dead.
I also had the weird sight symptom that you feel a little bit drunk/sleepy/in a dream/ foggy/ behind a glass window...
Luckily i got over my anxiety problems and i havent got an anxiety attack for almost a year , but the derealization stayed.
Hopefully all the "Feeling like a robot" feeling went away and i can finally feel Feelings and expirience them , but the annoying sight feeling wont go away .
It stayed ever since and it gets worse if i dont sleep well or if i sleep at morning and awake at night.

That was the brief...

I saw a post from a guy who posted it here really long ago...

I will copy and paste only the feelings that i feel the same as he wrote.
Btw (the anxiety came back because of loss of a few loved ones and me who got diagnosed with cancer before 2 years).

Here it is :

I didn't believe I was experiencing a panic attack, but several EKGs later, and after running from MD to MD, I realized my problem was less physical and more emotional.

I have another problem. I am wondering if it sounds like I am developing psychosis or a related problem. I have had such extreme depersonalization. I feel like I am not really here in reality. Don't get me wrong, I know things are real, and I know what to say to people and so forth to appear relatively normal. It is just that on the inside, my perception of the world has changed. This is really all scary to admit because I fear it could be the begnning of psychosis. For those who have experience with this kind of thing, please let me know. I am so frightened about this. I also feel like my brain is so foggy. I can't think straight and my senses feel out of control.

I also have a fear of losing control and doing something crazy in public. I am afraid to have a psychotic break and feel like I can't stop it from happening. Again, I have never lost control of myself or had a psychotic break.

The other thing that is frightening to me is that I have periods where I become very obsessed with thinking about existence. I wonder what created us, or who and why we are all here. I also start thinking if there could be life on other planets, and I get scared about the enormity of the universe and what it all means. I have had friends who have told me that they have had the same questions, but never get scared about them. For me, it isn't the questions, but the fact that my brain stays in a stuck position thinking about this.

I get scary random thoughts in my head sometimes. Based on what I have written, does it sound like I am on my way to developing psychosis? I am really afraid.

I sometimes expirience those things he wrote.

It will be much appreciated if you can respond me on how to handle those situations.

Thank you very much and sorry for the long post !.