(((PSYCLOX))). I am sorry that you are suffering at this time. One of the ways that I have found to put my past behind me, is to learn that no matter what mistakes I HAVE made in the past I try not to repeat the Past any more often then necessary, and I try not to let the PAST control the outcome of the Goals I have set for the future. I have also chosen wisely to stay away from things that would cause me to repeat my past such as Alcohol, or other things that would cause me to lose hope of the future Goals that I have set for myself, or that could cause harm to my well being either mentally or physically. Sometimes if you get around the right people and get the support you need to let you live in the present that helps Greatly to heal the wounds of the past, when you hang with the past crowd that causes you to just live in the past it stunts your conditioning and reasoning to move on in a consistent and reasonable manner, and brings your growth of competency and self esteem to a lower level. Since you are not being allowed to submit yourself to competent endeavours, by being engaged with people from your past at this time and you ae always being reminded that you are failing yourself, and you are not having your emotional and physical needs met by hanging on to the past or these people reminding you fo the past because it just consistently brings a sense of discontentment. I hope that you are attending AA and other meetings to ehlp you feel more inspired that you can presevere if YOU make the right decisions in life. Rayna(Here at Psych Central) Has started a lovely Group for AA and I feel that you could really benefit from the group in recognizing that forgiveness comes from awareness, and I am sure you will get something good out of the group since you know the group attendees at this time, that have been your support in the past. Please call your therapist if you are still not feeling well. Takec are. Soidhonia ..