Stressed out newbie here! Hi all. Hope this finds each of you relatively well. I'm officially done with bipolar, generalized anxiety, OCD, PTSD. However, the last counselor I went to said she believed I didn't have bipolar but borderline personality instead. I never went back. Since then I've researched the disorder and I swear I see my photo plastered next to every article. Lol. Over the years my symptoms have gotten worse. I'm extremely needy and dependent. I have overwhelming fear of abandonment. I go from hot to cold in seconds (mentally speaking) and just in the last two years I've gone from completely self harming behavior and moved to both self harm and aggression towards others. I become extremely irrational, yell, scream, throw things, and just recently pushed my wife during an argument. I'm totally self loathing. I hate who I've become. I don't understand why anyone stays around or even likes me much less loves me. Everyone just says I'm attention seeking or looking for an over abundance in reassurance because I have an extremely low self-esteem. My marriage is strained and so is my job. I am extremely lonely and I just need some friends and some help. Thanks.

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