I was made to reveal all my thoughts and my feelings. If I didn't I was not being honest with myself. I struggle even now, if I am being completely honest with others. I was not allowed to have secrets from them. They had to know everything. They would not let me be alone with my family.

I was told that I would die without them and the program.

I was held down for hours by girls twice my size because I refused to comply and admit to things I never did. This occured almost daily.

They did not allow me to read anything when I was on first phase, not even a cereal box, even though they would keep reading material in plain view.

I was told that it was my behavior and my decisions that have upset my family.

I shamed my family. I embarressed them.

They made me hurt others to help their cause.

They removed every layer of being with in me and left me exposed.

I was not allowed to go to the bathroom in private.

I was not allowed to do ANYTHING without asking first.

I was not allowed to walk about freely. I was led around by the back of my pants, much like a dog.

I was not allowed to speak with a physician, or adult of any kind with out a member of the program present with me.

I was not allowed to shower alone.

I was stood up in front of 150 other children and screamed at by gangs of them for several minutes at a time. Told that I was worthless and that I would amount to %#@&#! with out them.