hi Txcamd,

I'm not a professional & this is not a good situation to be in (although a common one for a lot of folks!)
You may have answered your own question. If its toxic & draining, then its only a matter of time till much hits the fan.

Maybe you can ask him for some time to (mentally) sort things out? Or a therapist to work with? There is too much stuff happening here for you to really gain clarity. You have to step away from it to see what you're dealing with &/or get help for the same reason (been there (but children were involved, so it wasn't solved immediately )

Wish you luck