What struck me is that you are aware that you do this in order for ppl to feel bad for you/ be liked...and that you stayed you have learned you can manipulate ppl by using this behaviour...Are you in therapy? Have you ever been dxd w/ a personality disorder? I would suggest talking w/ a professional about this. I was dxd w/ BPD in my 20's and desperate need for approval/love/kindness, over sharing, self victimizing, and using that to "manipulate" others whether conscious or unintentionally are all "symptoms" I have come to understand as part of my PD...other PDs share similar traits. Just a thought. Hope maybe you find it helpful..if not, I do not mean to offend.