The 'psychotherapy' page here is full of threads of people stressing about the fact that they are googling to know more about T, or doing other things (that they find disturbing) to try be - in some way - closer to T.

Some have commented about the way psychotherapy deliberately awakens attachment issues and gives rise to these impulses.

Presumably your T is experienced and mature enough to be able to help you with this. If not, you need a better T!