Loco, I have struggled with being away from my T also. I would look up his picture and listen to his seminars on you tube. i felt like a creeper. i was too proud to admit i needed more time with him. I did overcome this fear, got through strong transference, and am finally able to ask for what i need from him. I did tell him about the transference and he was awesome because he let me talk and never shamed me or made me feel awkward. Do not be afraid To tell T what you are experiencing. It eventually gets easier.