((((((Lost)))))))

I'm sorry you feel that way. It sounds like you are caught in one of those vicious circles. You want to be noticed, and want people to care, and even to notice that you are being quiet, and would like someone to draw you out, and make you feel wanted and needed. But at the same time you withdraw and are quiet. Is it because you feel unwanted? Feel like you need to test people and see if they notice? But if you aren't posting, you don't get responses, and then you feel like nobody notices you, and think that you are being abandoned.

I think that most of us go through that. Sometimes I hide by only replying to other people, and secretly I'm wishing that someone would notice that I hurt too (and sometimes they do). I've noticed that you were online a few times lately, but I haven't been able to keep up with more than just a couple of the boards here, so if I don't see you post, for all I know you might be posting someplace I haven't had time to read. We are getting to have so many people here, there is no way anyone could respond to everyone, but on the plus side, there are so many people that someone will probably respond. If you need to be noticed, or need some support, you need to come out and say it though. Otherwise we might think that you're content just to read.

You know, I asked my T to notice if I stopped writing to her, as if I did, I would probably need to be encouraged to pick it up again. Guess what she said? She won't enable me by agreeing to do that! It felt like a slap in the face, but she's right.

Winter is hard, and it can seem hopeless. Hang out with us, and let us know you are here. We'll get through it together, ok? You always have friends here.

Rap