I can kinda relate to what you are saying. I think I've actually had the "shock" of "learning" my diagnosis more than once... I definitely have very dissociated states and "parts" of myself/understanding, but I don't meet the dx criteria for DID. I have trouble relating to aspects of my life if I'm not in that particular head-space. I also only remember/connect with my trauma during flashbacks. Other times, it simply feels like a story I've been told.

I can relate to being confused by it all. It's been a slow process trying to work through it. I guess my super-sketchy memory (sometimes to the point of completely forgetting months or years of my life) speaks to the dissociative diagnosis... I also feel like I have different "sides" to myself, each with its own understanding, but it still all feels like me (except one part, but I know she's a "vessel" I created to carry the scary stuff)...

Um, sorry about the scattered nature of this response. I really just wanted to say I can relate both to the dx and to the uncertainty of believing it or agreeing with it all the time.