I've been in T for two years now, and even though it was my T that pointed out (ever so subtly) to me that I was DIDish, he just won't actually say it. He'll mention 'dissociation' but he rarely mentions parts, and never actually says - you have DIDish. Despite this its pretty obvious to both of us that there are many parts and Im pretty high up the DID spectrum.

Anyways, with the exception of a brief conversation here or there, Ive never spoken in depth to anyone outside of T about the abuse, or the DIDish, or anything. Until today.

A friend of twenty years came round to visit. Its been a few months, and I warned him Im not doing well at the moment. Well, as soon as he walked in the door we hugged, and I just completely broke down. That was it. Many hours of talking followed, and I eventually managed to get out "I'm in pieces" and looked at him meaningfully hoping he would get what I mean.

He didn't bat an eyelid, looked me straight in the eye and said "I know. I've known since the first day I met you".

WTF! WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME! OMG! It took another 18 years for me to figure it out!!!!

Im so blown away by the conversation. I do feel better for it, definitely. But Im also completely freaked out. He said he didn't know if anyone else knew. But he's not even close to being a shrink or anything. He's an electrical engineer! If an electrical engineer can figure it out. Has everyone else?! Why didn't I? Ive not been talking to people about because I thought they wouldn't believe me. But what if they've all known all along?! I just don't know what to think of this.