It is very sad that you feel that you have to be dead to get any comfort from anyone. Hopefully that dream/fantasy will change gradually. You have a good T there mouse.
Sending a hug to you.

((((((( mouse ))))))))
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Pegasus
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein