Death calls to me,
the calming dark dream,
light blinds one's eyes
darkness provides peace,
death gives one darkness,
frees one of the pain in this life.

Why should I embrace that light?
Why should I feel the pain of the brightness?
I wish to turn my back away from truth
to hold on to the peace that
the dream of death brings.

But somewhere in the light,
far in and too bright to see,
is the happiness that has been
promised to me.
But it is a fairy tale,
someone else's dream.
Death is mine, life in darkness.
Life in peace.

Should I believe what others say is true?
Trust in them as a way to pull through,
to wait until I reach that fabled place,
in the center of the light,
at happiness's gate?

What choice do I make?
Time will only tell.
If I choose light I will surely die,
as all things do.
If I choose death then I have just
taken the shortcut and saved myself
a load of grief.
But I am not the kind of person
who chooses the easy path.
I make all things more difficult then
they need to be.
Therefore I choose life,
in doing so I make my path to death
a torturous jaunt through pain and suffering.
But who knows I may be surprised and find,
that the fabled land of happiness does exist,
and I have been a horse's *** for not believing.
Carrie

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson