Depends on how bad my psychosis and anxiety are.

Sometimes it is:
warm
comfortable even relaxing
self-hatred

Yes, I am aware of how twisted and contradictory that is. I guess over 2 decades of dealing with it, it has become part of me.

With my anxiety and psychosis amped up:
Pain
Fear
Seething self-hatred
Panic
Hopelessness
Strong desire to self injure

I never feel sad though. I find that odd.