Personally at work the best way for me is to learn is to make a checklist of each step I have take for example...Click Here, Go to this page, Press save etc. and why.

At work they were proud of me when I first started and I made these step by step instructions cause we literally just about have no job aids and the ones we do are horrible.

Now I find myself asking repeated or the same questions over and they are frustrated with me. When I say I want to make a checklist they just say it over again and I cant write that fast nor process why the task works the way it does. so I need more time to take notes with step by step instructions.

Im sure they just think Im lazy and stupid. I admit some things I can look up and use resources online but I am used to relying or their brain to much which is my fault. But a large part of the job is knowing these things/processes that are not at all documented; therefore you have to learn from others. Ive been at my job for few years and I know theres stuff I don't get that I really should understand by now.

What I don't understand is why I don't get things like they do and process so quickly.

You can explain something to me a million times but I wont get it and suddenly someone will say something in such a way it clicks in my mind; and once Ive got it I'm good. People cant deal with someone like that at work and I seem lazy, stupid and hardly can be on time. I sent an email today asking a few team members how to do something and they responded. Of course I was totally wrong and embarrassed.

Then I asked this guy that has been there a year less than me and a process was explained to him once today and he seemed to get it. So I sent him my job aid I started and asked if he could help me and let me know what I was missing as far as steps and asked some reasons why things were done a certain way.

He said he was looking at my notes when I asked him about it and he was typing up stuff to respond.

He didn't follow-up and send me anything. I feel even more stupid now.

He probably thought as well "Look how long she's been here. Shouldn't she know that?" Then I felt even more stupid and think everyones talking about me behind my back.

I am on ADHD meds but I cant learn the same way they do..Things at work make me feel depressed and like I'm going to fail; cause I don't process the way they do. They're frustrated..Who can deal with that?