I spent a little time with h yesterday. I suggested we both, and our son, go to visit h's mother who is in the hospital.

I have noticed that h is now trying to act like he is more aggressive because I had told him to grow a pair. But, as usual, he's doing it all wrong in ways that make me cringe.

He did something so petty and stupid yesterday in a shop and I was so embarrassed! That's what he thinks I want him to be when I said grow a pair??? I'm too embarrassed to even say what he did.

I called him a character for doing it and laughed it off instead of criticizing him. But last night I woke up in the middle of the night upset about it.

It's so frustrating! I would so love it if he would act like what I think is normal and loving.

It's like the movie Groundhog Day, where Bill Murray keeps doing things wrong infinitely until he finally gets it right.

It's not me, it's HIM!